Now I’m no expert in parenting but going to an event that I was already hesitant to go to but for some reason decided to stop in got me thinking really hard… I mean some real food for thought.

The event was in honour of people of colour for Black history month a friend of mine had invited me and so I thought I don’t think I’ve ever really honoured my blackness in public with other people of colour so why not go. The speaker was someone very influential. So I guess I wanted to hear how this woman got to where she was today all while being a mother. When the question was finally raised about motherhood and how she had navigated through all of her rise to success all while being a single mom her response was this, “it was all a blur” which would explain a lot.

You see I don’t know this speaker personally but I do know of her daughter and I know that in someways her Mother’s success affected her In many ways then one and that’s what got me thinking…. even though she is very successful in her career the parenting piece was all a blur. What I’m saying is I don’t want my parenting and my time with my kids to be a blur because I was so driven towards my own success. We can find success in so many different things we can find success in the big things as well as the little things and sometimes the success that we do find is really those happy times and those connected moments with the ones we love.

Even as women of colour there is always this hardness behind us that’s more along the lines of ‘suck it up butter cup’, as oppose to the gentle nurturer. I can attest by my own mother and how she navigated through her career and being a Mom. Now that I’m a Mom, I can understand where they were coming from. They were single Moms who were really living in survival mode for themselves and most importantly for their children and so they did what ever they had to, to get to that next level, even if it meant that the kids wouldn’t get the gentle Motherly type.

So the question is how can we as parents nurture our success and our children’s success at the same time?….

These are some of the tools I’ve learned and continue to apply to my life and my family life.

1) in order to nurture the success of your children you first have to find out what they love… as a Mom I have always paid attention to the interest of my kids. My son loves science and nature and so we try and find activities that foster his interests.

My middle one loves gymnastics and is a natural and my little loves music and so I’m slowly moving her in that direction because that’s what she loves. Now of course as a parent I had different plans but when the Universe shows you the joy that comes out of it when they do what they love that my friends is success.

2) prioritize your time as a Mom and as a career driven woman. Sometimes we feel we can only do one but not both. When you’re running your business and trying to get it off the ground, the down time is very limited but that doesn’t mean that you can’t set aside down time for the people you love. Create a schedule that works and remember to add in DOWN TIME!

3) Be self aware… as parents we have a tendency of not being aware of the effects we have on our kids. We can be so focused in the success and the end result that we can sometimes have blinders on forgetting our kids needs which could just be them wanting Mommy time. Make sure we’re spreading the knowledge of where happiness really comes from. Not from the late nights at the office, but from those special moments we have with the people we love.

Well this morning went off as good as it possibly could. I mean I could have stayed in bed all day but morning called. Bonus was I was up before the children after the sleep over. The girls didn’t go to bed until 12:30am which means I didn’t actually go to bed until 1 in the morning. Anyways, My spiritual posse has been calling on me to pay attention, probably because I’ve had a lot on my mind. I pulled an amazing spread that spoke to me on so many levels.

As much about I’m always writing about how to navigate through the treacherous waters of life with love on your side, I’m still this littler girl with Big Dreams. I’ve always dreamt of owning my own business for as long as I could remember, I would play in my room as if it was my office, processing paperwork, all while looking after my baby doll. It was a cabbage patch kid. I’ve never thought I would do anything else. I could never quite put my finger on what the business would be but it was all mine. After having my son I couldn’t quite see myself not staying home to raise him. I also thought it was a good opportunity for me to start my dream business… Whatever that was. Now I’m very creative and am always wanting to invent and reinventing. I also never give up. I have had a lot of different people not believe in me, and honestly though I would make it. It just gave me more of a reason to work harder to prove to myself and to everyone else that dreams do come true.

So to be honest, I’ve been through many start ups and only just getting it off the shelf, only to put the dream back on the shelf. Frustrating of course. I’ve always let fear get to me. Fear of failing and having people tell me I told you so or this fear that I end up working this horrible desk job that pays a lot of money but makes me super miserable. All the woman in my life have worked great jobs but were never happy. So I thought if  did what they did, I would never have the opportunity to find out what makes me happy.  I think I finally figured it out. What makes me happy is ME!. Working on the unknown does for sure stress me out. I mean I do have to navigate between being a mom and being a business owner. Your time is always split, and both jobs are 24/7. But working on the unknown excites me. It makes me realize that I have a lot faith in myself or I wouldn’t keep getting back up again.

The tarot cards that I pulled were so accurate. Projects are fruitful, Faith and Confidence are high and will continue to rise. I need to stay focused AF and all will be well. I have to say, although my computer was giving me a mild heart attack earlier during the day due to all these software updates for 2019. Ugh!. Just when I’m trying to set 2019 off right. I guess it’s just a reminder that anything can happen during this process. I’m sure I’ll have a lot more to share.

Well before I head off to bed…. Yesterday was the first launch of Righteous Sun website out to the social media crowd. I kept it quiet to my Fam. I actually kept it quiet with almost everyone. I didn’t want the distractions, and I also second guess myself. This project feels different then the others. Maybe because for the first time it’s for me. Most of the other projects were for other people. Whether it was for my kids creating kids accessories for them or me giving a healing to others who were in need. This one just feels different. It makes me nervous as hell but I’m taking it all in stride. BTW… The launch is my online cosmetic and skin care Boutique. My goal is to provide people with all natural vegan friendly cruelty free cosmetics and skin care for the everyday and play!… You like those play on words?… Lol!

Ok Its getting late. I’m putting out there that I will be making $60,000 plus by the end of 2019. Big Dreams I guess… But Why Not?

As you know its the holiday season and the kids are home from school from school for the next week or so. It means a lot more time spent together because we spent all that money on presents and are not spending anymore until 2019…. Lol!

On my IG account @righteoussoleil I posted a video of my son playing with Nintendo labs. It was one of the presents we bought him for Christmas. He loves Video games, science and nature. He’s also 12yrs old and has little to no patience when it comes to putting in time for the important stuff. He’s is also a Virgo and well, Virgo strive for perfection and can get frustrated if its not achieved to their liking. That’s my son and that’s what we’ve been trying to work on with him. It’s a life skill that is super important for all of us to learn.

Sometimes the good things in life might take a little longer to achieve. 

And patience is the key.

Sometimes we let our emotions get the better of us, especially when we lose patience. Kind of like KIKI. When we get caught up in our feelings, we begin to think more in the upper part of the chakras. It just means that we are really caught up in our head, making us think irrationally. You know what they say, “Crisis first, think later”. Well do me a favour and don’t do that. When we think in crisis, we never give ourselves a chance to be present in our feelings. We react based on our thoughts rather then how it makes our body feel. How does your body feel when you fly off the handle and how beneficial is it to your body and spirit.

I have to admit that I can get moody from time to time but who doesn’t. We are human and we have feelings that must be expressed in order to grow. However, it doesn’t mean we have to ride the wild horse of frustration, anger or even sadness until we fall off and injure ourselves. It’s important to take the time to process the situations that we encounter. If it’s fucked up, then get angry just don’t let the anger get the best of you or you’ll miss out on all the loving lessons and blessing that can and will come your way.

“Don’t sweat the small things.”

He put the pieces together all on his own… He had a small moment but redeemed himself through patience and taming the wild horse of emotions within. I could be more proud of him….He’s growing up!

P.S. I’m sure as a Mom, this is just a start…Will he have other moments…Yes!…. But I’ll put this one in the books for a WIN!

Its been an emotional couple of weeks since the kids went back to school. Other years I was prepared, like a veteran getting the routine down pat. This time however… Let’s just say I haven’t bounced back from the summer and am trying to catch up. I was sloth tired, not wanting to get out of bed and forcing my body to move at a pace that was just not nice, so my body was telling me. I was definitely not listening to what my body was telling me because I am currently laid up at home with a cold. I NEVER catch a cold and I have an immune system of 10 armies. My army of fighters clearly needed to rest and recoup.

Note: Our bodies will sometimes force us into resting by knocking us out a an illness. It’s the spirit asking for us to STOP and RESTORE.  

Stop everything that you are doing including your thoughts and allow the spirit to restore its self to a proper balance.

Like I was saying this was the first year, I hadn’t had my shit together for back to school. My mind was still on laying under the sun. Can you blame me? I guess as you go through life you forget that everyone is growing up and so are you. I look like I’m 19 years old even though I’m 36, soon to be 37. Let’s hear it for the 80’s babies. The simpler times before life became more intricate. Well we’re in 2018 now, and when you think you have it all figured out as a person, an entrepreneur and especially a Mom and suddenly realize wait a minute this is a whole new phase I wasn’t prepared for. We were doing the best we could as parents, cause that’s  really all you can do… We make sure to give them all the love that they deserve and they deserve it all, and to see our son struggle with anxiety, all while trying to find his way through this now intricate world that has been created. It broke our hearts.

It broke my heart because it took me so long to get over anxiety and heal in general. It took many days of meditation and healing practices that I now teach and administer to others. I am a Reiki healer and intuitive counselor and not forget a kids yoga teacher…. and for some reason I couldn’t help my son. After tossing his cookies one morning and breaking out in a rash to wanting to come home early and crying in the school washroom. That wasn’t like my Marcus at all. I went straight to the principal and explained that he had began experiencing anxiety the begging of summer due to a tree almost fall on him and his friends during a wind storm. It was enough to get him spooked and enough for it to carry over and never fully recover. Only magnifying it with the change from grade 6 to grade 7.

We set him up with someone to talk to every Tuesday at school… he seems to like that, and because he’s bored outside when his friends go out at lunch  he helps out in the office, which he likes and so do I. This is all with the hopes that he gains confidence and finally settles into this new change.

While being on Mom duty, which is a 24/7 job I might add, I was also dealing with my emotional self. Wondering why I was so emotional and caught in my feelings. My period had  just ended. I should feel a bounce back, which I normally do. This time, I was forgetting everything. Thy Gym keys yesterday, the girls went to school with no juice box, my keys to the apartment when I took the dog for a walk… I’m pretty sure the list goes on but I can’t even remember that. LOL!

It got me thinking though. You know, as to why I felt like mush and didn’t know my right to my left. For the first time in along time, I hadn’t a clue what the Fuck I was doing with my life and where it was going. I cancelled one of my classes permanently. I was rushing into a lot of things and making decisions out of frustration.  Sometimes when we are clumsy, it’s our spirit telling us to slow down. I can’t lie… I even went as far as to question if I was really healed from all the trauma I suffered growing up. Sigh! I am about to embark on a new project. One that I was sitting on for a long time and knowing that I would do it with this particular amazing woman, I call my friend and in the way that seems fitting through Indigenous traditions and culture. We will be facilitating a women’s group that will aid in healing trauma that can lead to anxiety. We will be getting funding towards this amazing opportunity…. So how can I reach these people if I don’t tell my story? being the quiet one who just listens.  I never thought that the things I experienced was even relevant or of any importance and so I buried it away. Only find to finds other ways to heal or reprogram my thoughts or even me for that matter. The only things is I every so often resort back to those thoughts of mistrust and fear of only being able to rely on myself when times are rough….. and that’s just no true.

So have I fully healed? I now know that healing takes time. it takes emotions to be felt and expressed in any way that allows your body, mind and spirit to breathe. The roots of your trauma can run deep, so deep that it touches your ancestors…. and if we don’t heal from the core and sever those old thoughts and beliefs than we will forever be coping. I’m tired of just coping… I WANT TO LIVE!!! And I want others to live as well.

In the next couple of weeks I will hopefully be meeting with an elder. I never had the opportunity to meet my grandparents in person, and have always had a fascination with the wise thoughts and presence that an older person brings to the table.

Well I look forward to getting back to the new Me! This is only the beginning of me diving deeper into the vault of my psyche…. Just when you’re getting the hang of it.

It’s a Sunday afternoon and after having a not so great sleep, I woke up to Miss Aunt Flow this morning. Ladies, have you have had this moment where you feel this intense feeling of emotion that connects with you on some deep spiritual level, making you feel that your spiritual posse has some serious important message to divulge to you?… only to realize that it was just your period making you feel all types of ways?…and of course you can never decode the message.  I always feel like some High Priestess ready to spread deep knowledge to the world around that time of the month. Men take note; you can learn a lot from this. LOL!

Anyway now that I’m not all the way in my feelings and my emotions are not all over the place, I figured I would give myself some time to write. The kids are playing quietly with their friends after jumping around a hot ass gym for a bit. I clean a gym part time so that I can continue to live out my passion and see my dreams come true. A lot more work than I anticipated but worth it.

I have made a pack to release old thoughts and habits and replace them with positive encouragements and healthy habits. I’m beginning to realize that I have a duty to this body that I was born into and I want to see it shine in every way possible.

Note to self: Our spirit never wants to see us struggling or out of sorts. Its kind of like even though our bodies and spirits are one with each other, it still has a way of taking us off track every now then just to remind us of how it feels to be a hot mess. Cause we sure know no one out there likes to be a hot mess and misaligned with life.

Good question…. What are ways that you bounce back when you feel out of wack? and are you able to recognize when you are out of wack?

I know when it’s time to realign myself when I become like Tony Montana from Scarface… Just kidding…but I can get irritable when I’m emotionally off. This whole thing of feeling like a hermit has forced me to easily slip in and out of meditation. It feels pretty nice considering that has always been something that’s been hard for me to fully attain.

Higher Self: Meditation is not something that is attainable. It’s just something that always is.

Meaning Silence is always there…. Sometimes meditation can just sit above the surface, because our minds are so active that it actually takes longer for it to completely rest and be still. Leaving us to never fully deepen our conscious experience.

It’s kind of like the eclipse season is bringing us back to our source. The beginning of the beginning. You know what I’m talking about, Atlantis and the planet Sirius? The Mermaids, dragons and avatars?….  There was a time when everything lived in harmonious love. Remember?… If not, I’ll have to leave it for another blog session. It’s Actually one of my favourite memories that helped me to heal in a lot more ways than I even knew it would.

Great news!… I’ve sealed the deal with teaching yoga at the gym, starting in the Fall… Yeah ME!… I’ve also realized my worth and will be charging just a little under the going rate here in Toronto. Looking forward to teaching and generating more income from  what I love to do. Anyway off to take the kids to the park and tire them out hopefully.

FYI: As a parent, my favourite time of the day is bedtime…. LOL!

 

 

Ok guys!….. I’ve been battling with this for some time now and I think…. wait I know that it’s fully time to make a commitment to myself and to my surroundings. I’m talking about the people I am surrounding myself with.

When I moved to my community, I was on the mends from being broken. I was living with my Mother after moving house to house. FYI… There is nothing better than your Mother’s house and love to get you straight again. I had my two kids and had just started to rebuild a relationship with their Dad…. I was definitely still trying to figure it all out. So I guess you could say I was fresh. Fresh meaning new to this whole thing of stepping out of my comfort zone. So it had made sense for me to move into the neighborhood that I’ve called home for the past 9 years. my neighborhood is a place for a lot of new comers and first time home buyers, but its also home to largest housing community who are on assistance. Let’s just say it’s a community in transition.

9 years is a long time, but in those 9 years I grew up in every aspect of my life. Through that growth, I was able to find my voice, set boundaries and heal my spirit in a way that made my ancestors very proud of me. I rewrote history to be the first one in my family to start and own a business. So you can see that living in the hood as some would call it has benefited me. living in housing with all the drama and same victim stories is what makes me work just as hard to get out.

From the moment I moved in here, I knew it was important to surround myself with positive people. Which I did. It is never a mistake when the Universe pairs you with people…. NEVER!!!! Perhaps it was a karmic relationship that needed to be completed or your positive vibes attracted you to one another…. Either way, not a mistake. Every person that I was around led to more growth and understanding of myself and to amazing opportunities. It’s nice to feel and be supported no matter what, and I needed the support as did all the other women I encountered.

Years have passed and even though we keep in touch, we’ve all grown in so many ways that it only makes sense to fly and spread your wings, which is what happened. You know it can sometimes get lonely when you begin to move to your higher self. Once you begin vibrating on another level, you tend to noticed when someone is vibrating lower than you and well then…. You just want to run the other way. So this overhaul thing really has to do with me making a commitment to NOT FUCK with ANYONE who is NOT SERVING their HIGHER PURPOSE. Cause let’s be real, If they aren’t serving their own higher purpose, there is no way they can serve mine.

You know people say you attract what you are….BUT….. I was on IG and someone had posted that it was a myth and the reality is that their are people out their who are constantly running on low vibes and will latch on to those who run on a higher vibe for replenishment. There are just some people who are will always bring the drama or the gossip and there are some who want to always make excuses. Meanwhile  repeating the same bullshit and continue to vibe around the same people they know is no good for them. Well…. I’M OVER IT!….

I’m over it because I’ve heard it all before (in my singing voice.) I’ve heard the same sob stories with little to no change and I’m doing a complete overhaul of who I will  and will not fuck with. How can I get my money right or my career if I’m constantly hanging around people who are not on time for life. Who are still sleep walking. Some would say, ‘ You should be more sensitive to other people’s spiritual growth’ But what people need to realize that if you’re growing internally, you will automatically see results externally. As IG Artist @lonniebee said, ‘I will still fuck with but I wont stay stuck you’….Truth!, but I want to take it a step further because I believe in order to make room for new peeps in your life….others have to fall off….Sending you safe travels.

Even as parents, we need to make sure that who are kids are hanging with. I make it a habit to only hang with parents and family who are not full of drama and outlandish stories, but still looking for solids in my life, if you catch my drift. If you’re questionable, then my kids won’t be going over to play. It would be like sending them into the lions den. What kind of Mom would I be?

Bottom line….. I want to continue to make moves and no longer stand still. That is why I am more determined then ever to accomplish my goals. That and I’m getting to old for it all. Have I truly outgrown my neighborhood?

What ways are you trying to make moves? and do you find yourself outgrowing certain people and things?

It’s Time to Level Up!!

Would love to hear you comments. You can connect with me on righteoussun.co

and yo can also find me on IG under Rightoeussoleil where I post me and all my positive vibes.

Also decided to start a Patreon page under righteoussun so we’ll see where I’ll go with that one. I do want to find ways to connect and help others all around the globe.

So stay tune!

So there’s this new wave of grandparents who are choosing to spend less time with their grandkids and family and more time to themselves. I’m not faulting them for that, they worked really hard and deserve a break. But it seems like they forget what it’s like to be a parent. They forget how much work  it is and how important it was to have some quiet time to reconnect with themselves and with their partners, if they’re in a relationship. That quality adult time I realize is crucial in having a healthy loving relationship with yourself and with others. Not to mention how important it is for the kids to receive guidance and social interactions from others such as family members as long as its healthy and productive.  It’s especially important for older people as well as adults to spend time with children. That helps for us grownups to reconnect with their inner child. Sadly there are many grandparents that say to their kids, “You had them so they are your responsibility.” I agree  to those words, I chose to have them and wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. However at some point in their lives they were parents and I guarantee they were also in need of some downtime. Downtime allows for us to re-center ourselves so that we can come back with open arms to our loved ones and our children. How can we give love to others when we barely have time to give it to ourselves?….  and so society says we must put ourselves to the side to take care of our kids and when they are all grown up and hopefully out of the house only then should we be allowed to enjoy ourselves and our partner if we still have enough energy to do so. All I’m saying is that when I get older I want to have the opportunity and the privilege to not only see my grandkids but also be an intricate part of their lives they will be giving me the best gift on this earth before I have to leave it. Just to be able to see the next creation of generations and they’re beautiful spirits to be able to share the wisdom that I’ve learned with them and vice versa would be an honour that I’m glad to take on. That is a gift to cherish and I would never trade that for anything…. oh yeah!!!…and the good thing is you get to bring them back to their parents. LOL just saying!