Body, Mind & Spirit, growth, life lessons, Messages from the Heart, Uncategorized

In Her Dreams

I went to bed feeling like junk last night and woke up in a junkyard. Let me further explain. I had been throwing up from pregnancy sickness. I find that I start feeling sick when I have no more energy and with three kids who are having a bit of trouble getting along lately, there is little energy for me because I’m having to use it on them.
All I wanted was to feel better and it felt like it was never going to happen. So, before I closed my eyes, I asked God to send me a message and message in my dreams.
The dream went like this…
I woke up in a junkyard with my husband. The scene was a cross between Suicide squad and Mad Max. It was crazy. Everyone was behaving like savages and all I was trying to do was get out alive and unharmed. My husband seemed to be very calm throughout the whole as he usually is. The sky was a burgundy red and the air was filled with smoke. Everyone was dressed in black leather and their clothes were tattered. They were all covered in tattoos and all carried machine guns like they were accessories. The women’s hair was long wet and stringy like they had never used shampoo let alone know what shampoo was. The men were very scruffy and some were missing teeth. All I wanted to do was get out of there as fast as I could. My husband was trying to sell them parts that they were not impressed with and the longer we stayed the more upset they got. I begged my husband to leave, to which he said ok. I began running back to the car only to find that they had trashed it leaving us with nothing and no way to get out of there. As I looked back, I saw one of them laughing getting ready to torch a car which would, of course, blow up. This was our cue to exit. My husband and I ran down a dirt road that led to a large boat. We jumped on. We were safe at last. Or so we thought…
We were on this boat that was full of trinkets and random misc. Parts. All of which they were getting ready to either be sold or headed off the incinerator. Either way, we knew we need to get off this boat. The boat had to make the last pit stop to pick up a few more parts, and that when we decided to come off. We spoke to the ticket handler and told him we needed a ticket home he gave us our ticket and told us to follow the pathway made completely of rickety wood and you would see some taxi boats. We followed the instructions only to find hundreds of handmade Chinese sailboat tillers. Each one had a person on the end of them as the driver. My husband hopped on one and sailed off and I was next. I jumped on and laid down afraid I would tip over because of how narrow it was. We began to sail away in a sea of sailboats, navigating our way through the crowd of boats. As I laid perfectly still a song began to break out like it was a musical number. Hundreds and hundreds of people from all walks of earth were standing on these narrow sailboats singing and jumping from sailboat to sailboat. It was a bit overwhelming and I was afraid that someone would jump on my boat and tip me over.
We finally got the shores of Egypt. That’s right! Egypt! The sand was thick and soft like satin and there were people to greet Me. I had lost my husband along the way but managed to see him on the shores. We had separated once again but for some reason, I was ok with this. I felt very calm and at ease with my surroundings. There was a celebration happening just over the sandhills and these beautiful women dressed in traditional Egyptian clothing were guiding me to the festivities. I can remember it so vividly. The women were draped in layers of bright rich fabrics adorned with jewelry. Their faces were obscured with sheer veils and the only thing I could see was their eyes that beautifully lined with black eyeliner. As we got closer to the celebration, I could hear the drums and the tambourines. There were traditional Egyptian Tents everywhere along the sand. Everyone was happy. There were smiles and laughter, food and drinks. There was also a word that stood out to me. The women had said it to me once I had arrived onshore and kept saying it to me as they escorted me to the celebration. “Mashallah”, “Mashallah” they kept saying. It was echoed throughout the land. So much so that I repeated it to myself over and over again so I wouldn’t forget it. When I finally came to and open my eyes, it was morning. I rubbed the sleepiness out of my eyes and went straight to my phone to google the word. Thank goodness for the internet.
“Mashallah” is an Arabic phrase that means God has willed it and is used to express appreciation, joy, praise, or thankfulness for an event or person. It’s also a common expression that is used in the Muslim world to wish for God’s protection.
Before having this dream, I went to bed and asked God to send me a message. Any message because I was feeling like I couldn’t make it another day with this pregnancy. Imagine feeling sick every second of every minute and feeling like you’re using every ounce of your energy just to get through each day. Well, that’s me with this pregnancy and I am finding it very difficult. God told me I would have a fourth child and that success would come in ways in ways that I could only dream of through writing and sharing my message of love and faith to those who needed to hear it the most. So, what do I have to say to all of that?… MASHALLAH!

life lessons, Messages from the Heart, Uncategorized

Know Thy Fu%king Self

Wow! what a title right? You know what’s funny?…. I’ve actually left the title blank just in case one of the kids wake up and come into the living room… They can read you know…LOL! and they’re nosy like all kids.

For some reason, I feel like my body is going through a metamorphosis of some kind. Like a combination of the Transformers meets Care Bears slash Jem and the Holograms. That fall season is creeping up. Summertime was fun but it’s time to go deeper within. In thought and in life, and the changing of the weather does that. Fall brings a sophistication to the whole changing of the seasons.

But….. Back to the title and why I chose it. I LOVE astrology charts and horoscopes, Tarot cards, you get the idea. I love anything that connects back to the centre of it all. So in my younger days, I took it very seriously and would hang off of every word that I read when it came to a psychic or a horoscope. It’s like I would wait to hear what my horoscope said to make the next move. It never got out of hand but I became very reliant on it for emotional purposes. Not reading everything in entirety and only taking the pieces that I wanted. Sometimes great things came about and other times…. well let’s just….

You should always pay attention to the entire picture. That way you won’t miss a thing.

Anyways, it became this journey to find out ME!….. That’s why I read the horoscopes and went to the psychic, who was amazing by the way. She was like a Grandma to me if only for a bit. She was small in stature, Scottish and her name was Doreen. She was a gift to the world. We will leave that story for another day as well.

The more I read about astrology and the horoscope for the Libra sign, the more I began to understand that I could navigate through this world with the help of the Universe. The Universe within me really.

So I was sent a website that gives you a free detailed astrology chart once you put in all your info. I wasn’t going to do it because one of the things that I’ve been working on is to really and I mean really have more faith in myself and my intuition. I’ve done one before and it’s pretty accurate and this one was no different.  To be honest, Since I’ve made a commitment to get to know myself more on a deeper level, it has made me realize that I really fucking know more about my self than I thought. Reading as much as I could of the chart (it is crazy long!) only solidified all the hidden parts of me that only I already knew was there… I was just keeping to myself.  Those who are close to me know the hidden side of me from time to time and even then, only You know You in the end.

By reading my traits and how I operate in the world, I realized that I have a lot to offer the world and that it’s my traits and personality that has gotten me this far and will get me through the rest of this journey with the help of the Universe of course.

Getting the time to get to know the Fuck out of Yourself is probably the most important thing you can do in life. Even if no one else can see the work you’re doing internally, know that it is just as important.

Note to self: You can’t use your gifts talents and abilities if you don’t know who you are.

Just an update, I have posted up the Flyers for my official independent 8 week yoga class. I’m feeling really confident about it….. I was going to say that I feel really good about it but confident yelled in my ear so I had to switch it up. It’s time to shine the light and help others shine their light too.

I’m not afraid of the dark anymore!

 

Friendship, growth, life lessons, Messages from the Heart, Uncategorized

The Hermit

If you have been following me, you would know that on e of my major complaint is not having enough positive peeps in my life. You know the ones that I’m talking about. that Best Friend kind of peep. Now I’m not all about having to many people at my table, as it is by invite only, my friends list is pretty small. I believe that too many friends can cause confusion and delay. If you’re a parent, you know what I mean. (Thomas the Train movement on this page today).

As a kid I wanted to have as many friends as possible, so much so that I couldn’t see between those who had my best interest at hand and those who didn’t. I carried that unwavering feeling of trying to fit in all the way to adulthood. Having kids changed that right away for me. I became a hermit. I think I always I’ve always enjoyed my own company really. I talk to myself and I answer back. I am truly my own best friend. I take my own pics to…..LOL! Sometimes it can be lonely as fuck though. No one to really laugh at your jokes or sing with you in that moment when its needed. No one to come over and have a girls night with….. I do get along with women, I promise.  Sigh!

Maybe its for the best….. Not having a lot of girlfriends and all. It just makes things messy. right? For some reason we get jealous way to easy and God forbid we find a man, well that best friend will be M.I.A. until further notice. We become Moms and go M.I.A. Here’s a thought, when we go missing in action, and don’t respond to ourselves, then it’s like we go missing from our true selves, and its up to us to find ourselves again.

Maybe its the Universe telling me to cool it down and relax. There is still more work to be done internally, but I’m still human. I still want to kick back with my girls, whoever they may be.

Sometimes I’m waiting for the Universe to tell me something magical only to tell me to dive deeper. like how much deeper can go. How much deeper do I have to go to see the fruits of my labour? This retrograde has me fucked up. Honestly!…. How about you? how have you been holding up?

Ever since being initiated into Reiki, I lost a lot of people who were no longer on the same vibration level as me. See what reiki does is allows the body to heal itself through light touch administered by a practitioner. If initiated, the practitioner’s spirit fast tracks to the next highest vibrational level. leaving others who are running on a lower vibrational level to fall of. So basically those who do not serve my higher purpose… well, “Boy Bye”. Good for my spirit, it needed a purge. wait1…getting something….. They said, that for all the things that are going to happen for you in and in your life… all of it being major, that we want to make sure that you have the right people in your corner. You know, the ones that genuinely have your back? that really just want to see you win…because when you, we all win.

I have been in my feelings like Drake with Keke, while also acting up like I’m on my worst behaviour or on the verge of it. That’s it I’m definitely in need of some meditation time. Go with the flow, reflect and connect and everything will soon pass. My mantra for the rest of the day. What are ways that you try and connect to other women who are in alignment with the same flow. mind you everyone’s flow is unique but you can still be on the same wave length. Have you had t a change of friends? or realizing that it’s time for change. Are your friends serving your higher purpose and spirit?

And is it lonely at the top? Once again would love to here your thoughts and comments.

 

 

 

Messages from the Heart

July 17th, 2018.

So I’m in the middle of a serious clean. My apartment and mind was a little in disarray. I’m the type of person who cleans in sections… to much for any person can be overwhelming. And I always attribute a cluttered space with a cluttered mind. Im not sure how it works but it works. I think it’s a visual thing and a definite energy thing as well. I am still process as we speak in making a lot more room in my head. I’m just taking a break.

Something happened yesterday that got me thinking. During my serious clean, my little one comes to me and says someone’s at the door. I was in such a zone that I wasn’t really down for any interruptions. I left my mind for a sec and went to see who it was. I’m in a little shock to see my neighbours daughter standing at my door looking tired and frail. She looked like she hadn’t eaten for days if not longer. and she’s only 19yrs old. She had come to ask me if I could clear some crystals that our neighbours had given her for healing. Crystals are amazing for that. I cleared them and she began talking. She’s going to bars with friends and drinking until she passes out. Sigh!…… I cleared her energy the best I could and left her with this because lord knows I love to help the broken spirits….

I said,

Only you can break the cycle that has been passed down to you through energy and DNA. No matter the cards you’ve been felt as a child, good or bad, you have to know deep down that if you had children, you would want the best for them. You would want them to have better life than you did… I’ve been there, we’ve all been there. I’m now in the position of breaking the cycle in my family by owning my own business….And that was me saying, “I want different for myself and for my kids”.

I left it like that and prayed that she left with something. When you think about it, it really is an internal battle. The spirit finding ways to cope with the spiritual scars of life…. even though the spirit is sensitive, its also very resilient. It’s when we put in the extra love that the spirit begins to wake up and remember… we were just to far removed and hurt to see. It all comes down to you.

As a reiki healer and an intuitive spiritual Counsellor, I would love to help others fall back in love with themselves. I am open to receiving new clients and new opportunities that allow me to express my gifts talents and abilities and share them with those who are interested. As I continue to grow in my practice so will the abundance in my life. I am grateful for the here and now and what is to come.

Just a little affirmation out into the Universe.

Messages from the Heart

July, 16th, 2018

Ok…. I’m literally on the toilet typing this. (Way too much info)…lol!…. but I’m on the verge of serious change and it’s like my spiritual posse needs me to document it..ok, I need to document for more piece of mind. I also just need to her out of my comfort zone in regards to using the voice that was given to me. You know it’s like I have a million thoughts running through my head at any given moment that I find it hard to formulate those feel goods that get me through the day. I always get amazing message from my posse to get me through the day and I’m always like… I’m going to forget it in about 5 min. I am a Mom you know…. if three, so that means 3 times less the memory.

I’m hoping the more I write the more I will open up in my creativity and I’m just being dedicated to myself. A dedication of no longer being afraid of my words and their impact because it’s for me first… (No offence) ugh!… there I go again. I’ve gotten as far as starting my own business which is slowly becoming successful in its own right… you know when you’ve been looking for a platform to work from and the whole time it’s You!… EPIPHANY!!!… I’m working on and from my own platform. I just need to make sure I nurture my roots to make me stronger and secure in who I am and what I do. Isn’t that crazy?… my platform is supportive and loving and always giving positive feedback. I’ve been searching for a unique platform to come and sweep me off my feet to hall me catapult my life in all honesty and the reality is… I need to work on the platform that was given to to reconstruct… I’ve always loved renovations, but who likes to be in the middle of it… we all just want to see and live in the end result.. it obvi takes work.

They say that a Womens cervix is made out of the same tissue as your cervical spine.. when one is open the other opens as well. This is why during an orgasm a women is more likely to become more vocal. It also means though, that if you’ve experienced trauma in that region or are not rooted in You then you’re more likely not to use your voice. You can learn a lot from social media.

Anyway, I’m pretty sure my thoughts went in three different places…. but the summary is still the same… I’ve learned a little bit more about myself… which only helps you to grow more.

Until next time…the kids are still sleeping and will enjoy this peace and quiet for a little longer. Until next time.

Messages from the Heart

Just a moment to myself

Since Summer had started it’s been pretty difficult to get any work done. My secret so far to keeping my self sane is waking up earlier than the kids. Them sleeping I’m has been a lifesaver. Now mind you, sleeping in for them is 9 in the morning. Yes I’m up at 7am but I get a lot of stuff done. Like… Meditation for about 15 to 20 minutes and I checked my email and then I get any work done that needs to get done that can’t get done when children are up…lol!

I can’t lie it’s been really difficult not having down time for a longer than an hour and a half. I as well as many parents are clearly spoiled for most of the year when the kids are in school. So it is a big adjustment to keep them entertained for two months straight day in and day out. Even tougher when there’s not enough family to help look after three kids when you want to break. Since we know families can get into their own little bubble when it comes to life, it is totally up to me to keep my family moving and me with a calm interior. Not sure how long I will last, it really has only been a week….lol! But so far so good.

I’m not sure where I’m going with this but what I do know is that since officially starting my wellness business…I have been non stop and the momentum is on the rise.

Check out righteoussun.co to take a look around.

Rather than going against the flow of kids and summer vacation, I’ve chosen to work the Universe to accommodate my new lifestyle. It’s like my spiritual posse is asking me how bad do you want this… my answer is…. no summer vacay is going to slow me down. I’m currently writing this piece in the bathroom where the kids now understand after many years that I as well as all Moms require privacy while in the bathroom… AGREE!

I guess making time is what you make of it…. I’m finding my flow… it’s the same flow I had when my first born was a toddler…. only this time he’s 11yrs old… I added two more to the mix and I am all the wiser as Mom of three.

Affirmation: I flow easily and swiftly through the Universe.

Messages from the Heart

It was just yesterday that I was moving into my neighborhood and scrambling to find a school for My son to go to. He’s now 11 years old. I remember walking into the doors with all the forms, I went straight to the office and handed them in. When it was all said and done, they had told me the room number where my son would be learning. I went straight to Room 109 and glared at the picture that was stuck to the door. It was of a blond woman with a grin from ear to ear…. I had my suspicions of course… I’m a Mom! When the day finally came for me to drop him off to the care of another person… A complete stranger. It was one of the hardest things I could have ever done. Little did I know that I would spend the next 9 years with this particular class. Room 109. I have three kids in total and each one from my oldest son to my youngest daughter have all passed through this class room…. And yesterday was the last day I would be dropping off one of my kids for the first day of kindergarten and chatting with that same teacher in the picture. Oh! BTW, The teacher and I have built a great friendship in and out of the school, that will last a lifetime.

My not so little girl and last child graduated from Senior kindergarten.

I tried to hold it together at the graduation. Seeing the last of my kids all grown up and knowing that there won’t be one to follow. Factory is shut down for maintenance…. Self -maintenance. They’re getting older now and even though my womb will call out every so often for a child to bare. I feel deep down that Its time for to graduate as well. Graduate to ‘Parents of big kids. My oldest is about to go into grade seven. I stayed home and devoted myself to them to make sure that those first few years were the best….and I have to admit that every time one got to a certain age where they don’t need mommy anymore, I would get the baby feeling and out would pop another one. On third one, I said enough is enough. I knew deep down that she was my last. I knew deep down that feeling of changing diapers and breastfeeding was long gone for me. So today was bitter sweet…. As all three of my kids move on to the next milestone in their lives. So will I.